Emotional Regulation 101 Emotions; we all have them. Those feelings that act as signals for threats or rewards. Emotions act like a compass and sometimes offer much guidance. For instance, if you steal sugar and lie to your parents about it because of fear and your parents end up finding out, letting the fear direct you wasn’t really productive. However, you may experience the same emotion of fear when you see a rabid dog on the streets and choose to run. In this case, fear d

Journaling is one of the best and most accessible ways to tap into your inner child (and teen), learn about & from them and bring them forward. As you introspect and dive deeper, you begin to understand who you were before the world put labels on you. You begin to recognize your triggers, who you are and used to be, what’s working in your favor and serving who you are now, and you also begin noticing patterns and behaviors that are misaligned with who you are now and who you

Chances are you have some sort of wound tied to your inner child. This wound could come up for a variety of reasons. Maybe your parents weren't around much, your childhood bestie moved away, you moved around a lot, you had a bully, you went through psychological or physical abuse, or you come from a broken family. These experiences (and others I haven’t added), left a significant mark on you and the pain sometimes resurfaces seemingly out of nowhere. When it comes to healing

Inner child healing and inner child work have become more common phenomena in the world of wellness and mental health. Where I’m at currently I don’t want to limit inner child work to mean healing the toddler version of you but I think it’s important to acknowledge that inner child work also involves your inner teenager. In fact, there’s no specific age that our inner child is at. When you think of your inner child you might think of you at 6 and I might think of me at 13. Fu

I have divorced parents and about 9/10 years ago when my folks first separated, I didn’t think that affected me as much. Now I realize how much it actually does affect me. When everything aligns, I want to build satisfying, and happy (for the most part) relationships with whoever my romantic partner will be - and any other aligned partner in between. To do that I keep learning about skills, tools, and behaviors that will allow me to make the most out of any relationship becau

When it comes to communication and life generally, it’s important to be vocal about what you want and express your needs effectively. Otherwise, you risk always getting the short end of the stick and having your needs unmet which can breed resentment, frustration, and feelings of inadequacy. When it comes to standing up for yourself and communicating your needs effectively it all boils down to your approach. Being assertive is the goal here but often times there’s quite a thi

Life is lived in communication; it’s all around us from the music we listen to to the texts we send each other, to the conversations we have with one another, to the article you’re reading right now. In fact, by virtue of you being human, you’ve probably heard the statement ‘communication is key’. It helps us build connections and relationships by allowing us to share and express our needs, experiences, feelings, and thoughts as well as pass on information. Now the thing is,

Okay so I thought I’d be able to make back to back content on recreational self-care this month but I’ve been so swamped this last week. I don’t know how I made it through. So I’m not promising anything, but I thought it’d be good to come here & share some thoughtful, self-care gifts for you and your people that will be especially useful for starting 2023 with intention & mindfulness. (Oh and btw this is also a list of things I’d like so if you’re my friend pay attention to h

We’re almost at the end of our body confidence series! 🙌🏾I just wanna say I’m so proud of myself for staying consistent and getting here. This will be the final blog post of the series and I thought what better way to close this conversation than to close this chapter than to talk about how we can start practicing falling in love with our bodies where they’re at. That way if you choose to make any changes to your body it comes from love and not hate. This post will basicall

No, when I say shackles, I really mean it because the chokehold that diet culture has had (and continues to have) on us is wild. For those unfamiliar with what diet culture is, it’s basically the idea and belief that how you look (body appearance & shape) is more important than your overall physical and psychological well-being. It’s in the idea that health and fitness looks a certain way (usually thin) and that restricting what you eat is normal. Diet culture also assigns mo

Last Saturday when I posted this reel to promote last week’s blog post, I got a bunch of comments (which I’ve since deleted) that said ‘just work out’ ‘go to the gym’ and all the things around that. I’ve been very critical about my body for a really long time and I’ve put myself through some really crazy diets, fasts and workout programs with the aim of losing weight and no matter how much weight I lost, I was never really happy with my body. See that’s the thing, going to th

This month (November) I’m focusing on body confidence on all my digital platforms. The ins and outs, the good and bad, the insecurities, diet culture, and many other things about this topic. Follow me on Instagram & subscribe to my YouTube so you don’t miss a beat. Growing up, as soon as November came around, there was an obsession with losing weight through crash diets, detoxes, liquid fasts or whatever was trending that year. My mum’s side of the family and my dad’s too if

Self-care. I love this practice and concept but I have many problems with how self-care has been taught and presented in our lives. Because of this, self-care has become one of those things that feel intimidating, lonely, inaccessible and unsustainable. Today we’re focusing on deconstructing the narrative that self-care is all about self. While it has the word self right in it and while there are needs only you can meet for yourself, a large part of self-care is community car

I believe many of us have heard all this talk about love languages and if you haven’t, let me explain in a nutshell. The five love languages (words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, physical touch & acts of service) developed by Gary Chapman are basically the different ways we express and receive love. We don’t all communicate love in the same way and in that same breath, we prefer to receive love in different ways. The conversation on love languages has been foc

Your body is your home. You’re stuck with it until you die. Feeling at home in your body and connecting with it is super important for your journey with self. Whether it’s body neutrality, body love and self love, connecting with your physical body is such a wholesome experience that will take you through this journey of body love. Heck, physical touch is one of the love languages you can practice for yourself. Physical touch in this case does not mean just massages, spa trea

I always looked forward to the day I’d finally get my period. When I first got my period, I felt so deceived! It was nothing like the commercials for sanitary pads and tampons where babes were running around all happy with no worries. I got cramps, my moods were all over the place, my cravings were intense and not to mention the few leaks and stains I experienced here & there. Kwanza my first period came during a graduation party but that’s a story for another day. After my f

I’ve always had a good relationship with sleep. You could literally serve me an espresso and I would be able to sleep in the next hour if need be. I know that this isn’t a reality for most people though. In fact, I’ve noticed that out of all the people in my daily life (that I know well enough to know their sleep behaviors & patterns), my mother is the only other person with a similarly good relationship with sleep. We’re those early to bed & early to rise folk. More often th

Whenever I post a recap of my day on my Insta Stories, I usually wake up to a number of DMs asking about, recognizing or admiring how structured and routine-oriented my days are. I never actually realized this about myself until last year when I got a number of compliments and recognition about it and when I think about it, it really is who I am and what I’ve always done. Actually one way to know I’m not in the best mental space is by seeing that I’ve thrown structure and rou

I’m a firm believer in loving yourself first. The fact remains that you can’t adequately and fully give love to someone else if you’re unable to love yourself. I stay saying you can’t pour from an empty cup. This season, the love season is notorious for showing other people love but hardly do we ever hear the message of showing yourself love in this season. Love is love and you deserve some too and from yourself especially. Sometime back on my Thursday Talks on Instagram, I t

It’s the new year and I believe we have all officially resumed regular programming as of this week. The new year comes with a fresh breath of reinvention and it smells like the hope for being better and doing better. However, without being intentional and mindful, our hopes and plans for reinvention end up being forgotten. On my Insta Stories sometime last year, I shared some practices that can help you keep track of your goals. One of the things I spoke about was reinventing